Advantages of Being a Married Woman

1. A companion for life time  

Marriage certainly eliminates loneliness from your life. It is very tough for a single woman to live an unmarried life. With all your friends and close family living a busy life, being unmarried might make you experience a sense of loneliness. Marriage brings in a sense of companionship throughout your life.

2. Brings in financial advantage  

Marriage is financially rewarding. Not only can the married couple get better tax benefits than any single individual, but they can get better investment opportunities specially designed for them. Financial advantage also comes through better sharing and planning. Married couples generally have good understanding about how to share and generate savings, in order to live a better life.

3. Social advantage 

Marriage brings for you a distinct social advantage over your unmarried peers (yes, we know sometimes you feel like being single again, but that’s only temporary) People will not pester you with questions like- When are you getting married? Are you dating someone? or other sticky questions.

4. License to do licentious things  

This is still partially true in case of Indian society. Men and women who believe in the institution of arranged marriage or being celibate before marriage look forward to their wedding night with great anticipation. At the same time, being married brings added liberty for the girls who can party till late in the night with their husbands.

5. Gives you a new role in life 

Much before being a mother, a woman plays new roles of a wife, daughter-in law and sister-in-law which add new dimensions to her personality. It is not that you cannot have kids without getting married, but having a child by matrimony gives a legal status to the new born and much better acceptance in the society.

6. Emotional and physical security. 

Every woman desires a secured life. First it is the parents, and then it is the spouse who provides the much needed security. A married woman knows that there is someone who wants to take care of her, and who is ready to absorb her emotional as well as financial burdens. You will feel much more safer living in this world. 

7. Enriches the quality of life   

One does not feel like cooking, eating, shopping all by self every time. When you have a lovey-dovey partner to shower endless love and attention, life is simply wonderful. It is good to know that you are center of somebody’s world and vice versa. Caring for your loved one and his family will bring happiness and a sense of contentment.

From YahooSHE 

 

 

 

 

 

Staying Faithful

 While fidelity is becoming that elusive factor in many relationships, there are a few traditional hearts that still vouch for it. Loyalty, albeit a simple word, carries immense weightage. While some believe loyalty should come naturally to both the partners involved in a serious relationship, others argue that humans are born to be polygamous. It is your choice as to which side of the team you wish to be on, and if loyalty is your pick, then this article will help you know how you can be just that.

1. Control your impulses

It is easy and common to get carried away at any given opportune moment. But remember that while the excitement of the impulse will last a night, the guilt is going to last much much longer and will make you miserable. So learn to control your urges and tell your mind what is more important – a moment of pleasure or ample memories of love?

2. Be realistic

Having unrealistic expectations from the relationship or from your partner can be detrimental to the relationship. Learn to look at things from a practical point of view and be realistic in what you anticipate. Once you have a clear picture of what you can get out of this relationship, you will be able to accept it better and be loyal and happy and content.

3. Keep the connection alive

It is usual to fall in a rut when dating for a long time. Realise that the relationship requires effort and that it is your responsibility to make it work. Take up a salsa class, spend quality time together on weekends, or explore newer hobbies. Keep the spark alive and the thought of straying won’t cross your mind.

4. Communicate

Learn to focus on the good aspects of your relationship and not just the bad. Your relationship can go through a variety of stressful situations – financial issues, irregular sex due to work, family complications etc. Even in demanding situations like these think about the good and talk over the bad. Strive to find the balance and communicate well. (Dating, MensXP.com)

 So Is monogamy impossible?

"You lost that loving feelinga" - hall & oates

Here are 10 tips to bring back your marriage to blissful territory.

1. Try Something New

When you first got married, everything was shimmering, shining, splendid, no? It was such a rush to discover new things, places, and um, sexual positions, together. But even the most extraordinary things can lose their luster over time.

Make a pact to try new things together. Why not write a couple to-do list every new year? Plan adventures, take up new sports or hobbies, travel, or simply experiment with new dishes to spice things up. 

2. Cultivate Your Couple Habits

While it's good to break from routine, do continue all those tender gestures you initiated as a newlywed to bring back that lovin' feeling. The sweet habits and traditions you sow early on in your marriage can help shape your relationship, and always give you something warm and familiar to look forward to (say, celebrating monthsaries or a special good night ritual).

Graphic designer couple Carlo and Niña Herman, married for four years and parents to 15-month-old baby Finn share: "Cultivate a habit of thinking fondly of each other so that your times together are much sweeter." Carlo adds, "Make it a point to start and end the day together."

3. Be Silly

Bridal designer, businesswoman and mother of three Michi Calica Sotto still blushes like a newlywed when speaking about her hubby Jose. "When Jose is working [at home], he always has 80s tracks blaring from his desktop computer. When his fave tracks play—like Robert Palmer's "Addicted to Love" or Erasure's "A Little Respect"—Jose starts dancing for me. Believe me, he never dances in public. I end up cracking up! My dad used to warn me against boys who make me laugh. Dad used to say: 'Boys who make you laugh end up making girls weak in the knees!'"

4. Shed Your Inhibitions

The notion of having inhibitions can sound absurd after years of being married, but the truth is, many Filipinas are still demure at heart. Many are too shy to tell their partners what turns them on, especially if it's way past the honeymoon stage. When your sex life is a snoozefest, you may feel awkward about suddenly starting a striptease.

Tip: If you seriously want to turn up the heat, put your inhibitions and pride aside. Be open and vulnerable (read: tell him how you like it) and often you'll find that he'll be receptive to you. Likewise, find out what your hubby's fantasies are (role playing? Victoria's Secret thongs? Ceiling mirrors?) and indulge him when he's been a good (or very bad!) boy. 

5. Be Thoughtful

Even after 12 ½ years of marriage, Michi keeps things fresh with sweet, thoughtful gestures. "When I'm out to lunch or dinner without Jose, say it's with a sister or a business partner, I order something Jose may like for take home. He loves it when I remember him while I'm out. You should hear the sing-song 'Thank you honey!' Of course I sit with him while he eats take-out. It should always come with animated kwento from the meal I had without him."

6. Date night

Michelle, the multi-tasking mom behind the blog MyMomFriday.com, hypes the value of "cheap thrills and date nights" in her blog post Seven Years After I Do Part 2:  "Whatever happens, always have a few hours of bonding time, at least once a week. Say, watching a home movie, playing Wii, or just eating ice cream together. Whatever activity, simple or extravagant, find something to do to stay connected. You will need to schedule this especially with kids around!"

Admittedly, it can be hard to feel sexy and spontaneous while wearing a food-spattered apron and nursing your toddler. But sometimes, the challenge to creatively get your groove on amidst the domesticity makes it all the more exciting!

7. Keep Crushing On Each Other

Don't stop flattering your spouse even after exchanging vows. Niña says: "Keep on admiring and appreciating each other, even while work or other everyday concerns keep you from being together."

Michi agrees: "Jose loves watching TV interviews of me. One time while watching an ANC interview, he said: 'Honey wala bang script yan? Tuloy-tuloy ang sagot mo! Bilib naman ako!' [It's a] Mutual admiration society."

8. Look Hot, Feel Hot

Brides-to-be are always forewarned not to be lulled into complacency and "let themselves go" after marriage. Though it sounds like it's just for your husband's benefit, looking your best—take note, what YOU think is your best—is for your own self-confidence, too.

Cresta del Rosario King, who's been married to hubby Brian for 16 years and is now a full-time mommy of three, shares: "Take the time to keep fit and take care of yourself so you can stay attractive to your spouse. I think that works both ways, no? There is no other feeling like walking into a room with your arm around your hubby and thinking, wow, he's MY date! But the best reason is this: longevity. If we take care of ourselves now, we can live a longer, healthier life into retirement with each other!"

9. Pick your sparring strategy

It's different for every couple, so early on, figure out the best way to resolve differences—and, as they say, choose your battles.

Margarita Locsin Chan, wife and mom to two kids has found her own approach when fights arise with her husband Antonio: "We keep it going by not freaking out at one another. Fights are the biggest romance zappers, so when we argue, I back down—mainly because (a) my husband is predominantly always right, at least in a practical sense because admittedly I can go off the deep end, and (b) even if he is wrong, he will argue with me until I'm worn down. It's better to just let him win (wink! wink!)."

10. It's Not All About Sex

LOVE = HEALTHY

Get in the mood

 

A fulfilling relationship with your partner helps you overcome your daily challenges-a difficult boss, rush hour traffic, rising prices and random rudeness from strangers-and multiplies your joys. You have  something (or someone) to fall back on every day (thank God!). You are calmer and securer. How could that not be good for you? But it's not just that feeling of high, or the sense of security that makes love so wonderful.

There's emerging evidence about the physical benefits of love too: sex, kinship and caring all improve heart health, boost immunity, lower stress and give that wow glow to your skin! In fact, it may not be long before doctors prescribe steamy sex, romantic getaways and compassionate communication in addition to a healthy diet, exercise and sleep. Sounds good? Explore love with your partner to bring on happiness and cash in on the health gains.

Love protects your heart

A 2007 study from the University of Pittsburgh found that women who are in good marriages or relationships have a much lower risk of heart disease than those in high-stress ones. "This is possibly because being in a loving relationship reduces stress, which is a major risk factor for heart disease," explains Dr Anil Mishra, medmedical director and senior consultant interventional cardiologist at  Kolkata's BM Birla Heart Research Centre.

It's equally beneficial for men: men who have sex twice or more a week are up to 45% less likely to have a heart attack and stroke than those who have sex once a month or less, according to several studies.

It keeps you disease-proof
Studies have shown that lovemaking increases the levels of immunoglobulin A, an antibody that is the body's first line of defence in fighting bugs that cause diseases and infections. This gives your immunity an overall boost helping you keep diseases at bay.

One of the most concrete pieces of evidence comes from a study by Carl J Charnetski, PhD, a professor of psychology at Wilkes University and co-author of Feeling Good Is Good for You. He measured the  immune function of 112 college students, many of whom were in close, loving relationships.

He found that those who had sex with their partner once or twice a week had higher amounts of immunoglobulin A than those who had sex less than once a week or not at all. Charnetski was, however, surprised to discover that the immune systems of those who had sex three or more times a week were comparable to the no-sex group. According to Charnetski, the possible explanation for this was that "couples who have sex just once a week are simply in healthier, more secure relationships and have  nothing to prove."

It helps you fight cortisol

"Research on the neurobiology of love has shown its impact on several hormones and neuro-transmitters," says Prevention advisor Dr Prabha S Chandra, professor of psychiatry, National Institute of  Mental Health and Neuro-Sciences (NIMHANS), Bengaluru. Romantic love, triggers the release of  several neuro-transmitters such as dopamine, neuro-hormones like oxytocin and neuro-peptides like endorphin, that have an overall bearing on stress and well-being.

"These happy chemicals have a positive effect on your cerebral (and physical) ambience and seem to dispel disease-and-stress-inducing negative chemicals," explains Dr Jitendra Nagpal, senior consultant psychiatrist, Vidyasagar Institute of Mental Health and Neuro-Sciences (VIMHANS) and Moolchand Medcity, New Delhi. The release of oxytocin, for example, evokes feelings of contentment, calmness and sense of security focussed around your partner. Combined, all of these help to reduce stress.

Sex, experts emphasise, is only one aspect of love, important, but not as powerful as the real magic in relationships-bonding. That sense of being united, even when bad times strike, is what Brian Baker, a psychiatrist at the University of Toronto, calls cohesion. And Baker's research has found that cohesion is crucial to both health and happiness (more than a good sex life!).

In one study, he tracked 229 adults under job strain. Though they had higher BP to begin with, spouses in pleasurable marriages actually helped to lower systolic BP by 2.5 mm/Hg over a 12-month period. He also found that happy couples seem to know almost instinctively that doing things together and spending more time with each other adds to their happiness (see Work Out Together and Come Closer). It's not that sex didn't matter to these couples. "It's one component of satisfaction, but at the end of the day it was  their emotional collaboration that kept the marriage strong," Baker adds.

It keeps you fit

Sex is a fantastic workout! Says Dr Sudhakar Krishnamurti, andrologist, micro-surgeon, sexual medicine expert, and founder of Andromeda Andrology Centre, Hyderabad, "A vigorous round of sex can burn mega calories!" Studies say it can vary from 85 to 200 calories depending on the intensity and duration. This is the equivalent of walking between half an hour to an hour on the treadmill. "If it's vigorous, the pulse rate rises to about 150, which is equivalent to an athlete's pulse rate at maximum effort. Plus, the sexual act builds the muscles of the pelvis, buttocks, thighs, arms, neck and the thorax," says Krishnamurti.
Mumbai-based Reebok master trainer Vinata Shetty explains that the pelvic floor muscles that you build through sex not only prevent conditions like urinary continence but also lead to improved core strength.

It makes your skin glow

Sex increases blood circulation which pumps oxygen into your skin, making it glow. "Also, when you are happy (and love does makes you happy, right?), your endocrine system (that regulates your hormones)  functions properly, creating a good oestrogen-progesteron balance that has a good effect on your skin," explains Mumbai-based dermatologist Dr Aparna Santhanam.

Get in the mood for love, people. Getting healthy will never be so much fun! 

Monogamy . . . scientifically speaking

Research suggests we have a slim chance of staying with one partner. Understand how neuroscience looks at love.

Who hasn't heard about insecurities in love? Most of us at some time or the other have had to contend with the question-does he love me? Or the more vexing question, does he love me as much as he used to?

Helen Fisher, an anthropologist and researcher in this field, has found some interesting details about human love, trust and bonding. Going by her research, the human brain has three distinct motivation/reward systems for three areas of love: sex drive, romantic attraction and the longer lasting male-female attachment.

The sex drive evolved to motivate males and females to mate with an appropriate partner, romantic love to focus on the genetically appropriate partner and long-term deeper attachment for continuing this relationship and handling parental duties. However, Fisher points out that we can be deeply attached to one person, be romantically involved with another and feel sexual attraction for someone we have no attachment or romantic involvement with. While these motivation/reward networks in the brain are linked to each other, they are also somewhat independent of each other.

Interestingly, the brain chemicals that are released in each of these three situations are different as well. While sexual activity is modulated by the sex hormones, the romantic state has been likened to states of drug addiction and obsessive compulsive disorder. In fact, the brain chemicals involved in romantic love and these clinical conditions are similar! Dopamine and norepinephrine that are released when one is in the throes of romantic love increase focussed attention on the beloved, lead to feelings of ecstasy, increase energy and cause fear, anxiety and sleeplessness.

The low levels of serotonin associated with romantic love induce a state similar to obsessive compulsive disorder which induces one to constantly obsess about the loved one to the exclusion of everything else, including being preoccupied about-he loves me, he loves me not! While romantic love is a universally desired state because it gives our brain a high, feelings of trust and bonding (which actually keep relationships going) are equally important and have been part of a burgeoning field of brain research. Scientists have been interested in studying the love lives of the prairie vole, which is among the 3% of mammal species that appear to form monogamous relationships.

This fascinating research has focussed on what makes partners trust each other and also on what promotes monogamy. Following their ardent courting and mating, prairie voles bond for life. They prefer to spend time with each other, groom and nest together and interestingly completely avoid meeting other potential mates! When prairie voles have sex, two hormones, oxytocin and vasopressin, are released. Interestingly, oxytocin is the same hormone that is released when a mother bonds with her infant and is induced by breastfeeding. Paul Zak, a neuro-economist and trust researcher suggests that the secretion of oxytocin may be influenced by life experiences as well. Living in a safe, trusting and nurturing environment may help in the release of more oxytocin and also help us in reciprocating trust.

However, stress and isolation can result in just the opposite and lead to a biochemical state of distrust. How, then, does one combine romantic love with a deep affectionate bond? This is a complex field with no simple answers yet as there are many cultural, psychological and neuro-biological factors at play. It appears that the more nurturing and care you get, the more increase in oxytocin there is. This, in turn, makes you more trustworthy and care more for others-at least that's what the praire voles seem to tell us! Both neurochemical and MRI brain scan studies are, however, still trying to find answers.

I think am more confused now than ever LOL more in YahooSHE

It's the SLEEP that counts, not the SEX

According to a new survey by hotel chain Travelodge, 2012 isn’t just going to be remembered for the London Olympic Games or the Diamond Jubilee.

In fact, 2012 sees the death of the traditional goodnight kiss as 80% of Britons admit they are too tired to pucker up at bedtime...

It's not just about "going wild"

According to a new sleep behavior study, it seems as if the British are becoming less and less romantic between the sheets. So long to sweet nothings and late night cuddles - 46% of Britons apparently prefer to turn away and sleep with their back to their lover in a bid to get a good night’s sleep every night.

Even worse? A quarter of lovers reported they can’t even bear for their partner to touch them while they’re sleeping – when did sleepy embraces become such a turn off?

No more "I love you"?

And it’s not just cuddling that’s going forgotten in the bedroom - nearly 90% of the 2,000 couples polled confessed that they don’t whisper a sweet “I love you” before turning the lights out - and eight out of ten couples won’t even have a kiss before nodding off. 

What’s going on?

For the love of sleep

Well, despite sounding absolutely awful, relationship psychologist Corrine Sweet has explained that the findings actually prove we’re more comfortable with our partners than might first appear.

“Inevitably, once the first flush of lust wears off, with couples naked and entwined, it is more likely that the need for a good night's sleep predominates, so sleeping back to back becomes a favorable position in bed."

Sleeping in tandem

And, as nearly half of British couples sleep in the fetal position (on their sides with head and shoulders curled in and knees pulled up) with their backs turned to their lover, it seems as if she’s right.

Plus, despite showing distance, Corinne quickly explained that this popular sleeping position – far from meaning the flames have been doused - shows your trust for your partner.

Plus we guess a good night's sleep leaves those couples with enough energy to get down and dirty later on! 

More love and sex articles from Cosmopolitan.co.uk

Men's Intimacy Signs

You really don't have to do the deed to find out if your man is comfortable with intimacy. Take note of these indicators:

Go out for dinner – If he scours the menu and chooses the most boring dish on it, you may be in for a so-so time. Food is one of life’s pleasures so a man who loves to eat will probably be sensual, too. If he’s willing to be adventurous or picks something he’s never tried before, chances are he’ll bring the same spirit elsewhere.

Really listen – If he speaks in a monotone voice and hardly ever changes his facial expression you may not be in for one hot night. Men who move their arms, hands and face when they talk are more excitable and enthusiastic.

Look him in the eye – If he doesn’t want to look you in the eye, or looks away nervously every time, he’s either really shy or hiding something. But if he staring at you so much it’s making you uncomfortable, he could be too intense or self-assured. The perfect gentlemen should hold your gaze for a couple of seconds at a time – showing he’s interested and respectful.

Hit the dance floor – Dancing requires rhythm, variety, timing and energy and so does sex! Look out for men who can keep up with the music and don’t take themselves too seriously. Any man who’s parading around with his shirt off doing a replica of Michael Jackson’s "Thriller" is probably cocky and slightly selfish in the bedroom.

Ask to meet his friends – His friends have probably taught him or learned everything he knows about the birds and the bees with him, so find out what they’re like. If his mates are warm, sociable and funny, chances are you man will have the same qualities. If he greets his friends with firm handshakes and full-body hugs it shows he’s not afraid of intimacy. The more comfortable he is with expressing affection, the more loving and attentive he will be to you. 

Look at what seat he chooses – If he chooses the seat opposite you facing a wall he can’t be distracted by people watching – meaning he only has eyes for you! The more he focuses on you, the more he will be able to concentrate on pleasing you. A man who decides to sit in prime view of the bar may be looking for something or someone else.

More love and sex articles from handbag.com